So as this is Holy Week I found myself (mindlessly) singing Christmas carols to my daughter. I mean, why not sing Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer to an upset toddler in the backseat of the car on Holy Thursday? She didn't want to be strapped in, but how was she to know that if she could be patient for 5 minutes, we would be at the big park with the big slides and fun swings? All she knew was it was about 70 degrees outside and she had to be out there enjoying it.
So I got to thinking, what in the world are "reindeer games?" I mean Monopoly is listed in the song, but how would a reindeer play a board game? How would it move the pieces or roll the dice?
I may be unfamiliar with what reindeers play, but last night I got a good dose of "Toddler Games." You see, I had recently been sent a link to this blog about a lady who gave up screaming at her kids out of frustration and has successfully been able to be calmer and nicer to her kids and they have responded in kind. I am trying to be a better mommy and got to thinking that I could probably be kinder to my daughter when I am super tired and all she wants is more mommy time. Well yesterday was a pretty lazy day in our house (most Wednesdays are since Tuesday is the last of my three in a row night shifts), so it didn't surprise me when the little lady wasn't exactly sleepy at bed time. She hadn't gotten in her daily dose of maniac time. So instead of being highly frustrated at her for still being awake 90 minutes past her bed time I spent those 90 minutes playing Toddler Games:
-- Itsy Bitsy Spider - she has recently learned this song and the motions that go with it and LOVES it. Plus when the sun comes out and she starts swaying back and forth, sometimes she falls over and it is super funny!!
-- Rock-a-bye Baby - Lets just say this has always been a personal favorite of hers. She likes the actions and the fact she gets "dropped" - oh the giggles!
-- Ruffled Feathers - Since my little lady has always had a head full of hair, I occasionally (more so lately) will tussle her hair and say, "I'm ruffling your feathers." Which this of course makes her giggle. Well last night as I was laying next to her, she started ruffling my feathers. I started laughing so hard because I didn't think she would do it. I don't know why I didn't think she would do it - I guess it was just funny in the moment.
-- Making Baby's Nose Numb - I haven't been getting a lot of baby kisses lately. When I ask for a kiss or a hug I have been getting a lot of "no" head shakes. It saddens me, but I know she is just testing her bounds and I know eventually I will get my kisses and hugs again. Well last night I decided she may not be giving me kisses, but I am going to continue giving her some. I kept blowing raspberries on her little button nose. Well the vibrations had to tickle, because she would just start laughing, then pull away, rub her nose, then after a couple minutes she would put her nose against my lips again.
So basically I spent 90 minutes making my daughter (who really just wanted to sit on my lap and cuddle) laugh and squirm. Did she finally go to sleep - absolutely. When she was ready for sleep, she curled up on her pillows, tried a couple different configurations for comfort and finally settled on the original one, then went to sleep. She may never remember these times, but I will never forget them. Had I gotten frustrated with her and kept trying to tell her to lay down and go to sleep, I probably would have still spent 60-90 minutes wrestling with her and it would have ended with both of us in tears. This way, we both went to sleep with smiles on our faces and good memories.
Showing posts with label Baby issues. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Baby issues. Show all posts
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Saturday, March 2, 2013
Keeping Mommy Humble
My daughter does a GREAT job of keeping me humble when I need it. This past week I was paid a pretty awesome complement by an uncle. He reaffirmed me (completely out of the blue mind you) by telling me that I am a great mom and he is proud of me. I was feeling pretty puffed up. I won't lie. Well about 3 hours later I decided to take my little pumpkin to the local library for a reading/play group. My little angel decided to turn devilish in public. She started throwing toys, hitting, and screaming for no known reason. Of course we left immediately - no need to subject anyone to that! On the walk to the car she started showing that she was sorry (hiding her eyes, hugging me, kissing me - the usual when she knows she did something wrong - her way of saying "sorry" even though she can't verbalize it), so I told her we would go to the grocery store real quick. That was a bad idea! After about 3 isles, she started screaming again. I leaned over to quiet her (and give her a kiss, which can quiet her) and she reared back and headbutted my nose with all her might. Of course I instantly started crying in pain and my nose started lightly bleeding. So I got the pleasure of going through the checkout line crying, with a screaming baby, and a possibly fractured nose.
So I'm such a great mom that my kid felt the need to have multiple melt-downs in public. I guess I should be happy that it took her 16 months to have her first true meltdown in public and hopefully it is her last. I am not holding my breath about that though!
So I'm such a great mom that my kid felt the need to have multiple melt-downs in public. I guess I should be happy that it took her 16 months to have her first true meltdown in public and hopefully it is her last. I am not holding my breath about that though!
Monday, January 28, 2013
Open PSA to all regarding the loss of a child and your behavior
I have had the unfortunate misfortune to lose a few babies to miscarriage and stillbirth. It sucks, but it makes me expressly qualified to write this. You see I am not the only one who has suffered this inconceivable loss. It seems like things go in waves, and right now the wave of multiple people I know losing their kid before knowing them seems to be high - a fact that makes my heart ache. My prayer would be that no mom - or dad for that fact - would ever experience the heart wrenching pain that drains the parent of all energy and lead to a crisis of faith. That being said, it is a reality of our broken humanity. My hope is that through this post, I can give some insights on HOW one should behave toward these parents - what is acceptable to do and what is not. I have broken up this post into GREEN light, YELLOW light, and RED light actions. Please consider what I have to say - I speak from experience.
GREEN LIGHT (You can say or do these things without risking offending the grieving parents)
-- GIVE THEM SPACE!!!! This seems counter-intuitive. When an adult dies we rally around the grieving family, hug, and tell stories about the person who has passed. But when a parent loses a child so young there are no stories to be told. This unexpected loss leaves everyone asking "WHY?" "WHAT?" "WHERE?" Why did this happen? What exactly happened? Where do we go from here? All these questions have limited to no answered. The parents need time to process this in their own way. This processing can't be done when everyone is calling, texting, trying to get a hold and by extension smother them. The mom and dad of the lost infant need time to spend with each other and grieve before they can face the world and grieve with extended family members. That is not to say they don't love their extended family, but the moment the vow of two becoming one flesh in marriage, the parents of the these new (grieving) parents and siblings become EXTENDED family, not immediate family. A new family is created in marriage, and while this is generally celebrated, when a child is lost, this is the first thing that is forgotten. Even if you are the mom, sister, grandmother, you are not entitled to the inner circle. Get over yourself - they are in more pain than you are. They will reach out when they are ready. Especially if they request time to process what is going on, GIVE THEM SPACE!
-- LISTEN!!! When the mom or dad does reach out to you don't talk. JUST LISTEN. Let him or her guide the conversation. Don't ask an excessive amount of questions. Scratch that, don't ask any questions. Ok, maybe one or two, but none about what happened - at least not in the first year. The wounds are still very fresh and you can't imagine how much pain it causes. Trust me, he or she will open up when he or she is ready. One day it will be like word vomit. The first time details are told it will be a raw explosion of emotions and tears. If the parent wants to talk about the latest baseball game, let him or her. Be grateful that they are talking to you.
-- BE AVAILABLE! But don't be offended if you are not the one that is "chosen" to be the first, second, or even third confidant. After my husband and I dealt with the unexpected loss of our son the people I reached out to weren't the people you would expect. I reached out to a few members of the clergy (ok, so that one should be expected.) Next I reached out to a friend who was also pregnant at the time and who's baby just happened to be due 1 month before my son was supposed to be. This friend just happened to be a social worker. I just needed some sense of "normalcy" while knowing I wasn't going to be interrogated. I also wanted to know about some counseling resources. After a while I reached out to a friend who just happened to be pregnant also, and who's daughter was supposed to be born within a day of my son (they practically shared the same due date). She was (and still is) a dear friend who was pregnant with her third child, never has/had lost a child, but is one of the best prayer warriors I have ever met. I still required some sense of normalcy and hope that things could be better. If you notice - I reached out to men who have no clue what is like to be a parent, but are good listeners - I reached out to two women who know what is like to be a parent, but no clue what it is like to lose a child, but they are good listeners. It wasn't the overbearing people who kept badgering me who I talked to first. I wasn't ready for all their questions so I kept them at arm's length. It was the gentle ones who listened who helped me through the tough times. I did talk with family members about it, but much later. It wasn't until months later that I reached out to fellow mothers who had lost children. All in due time.
-- "Is there anything I can do for you?" The answer is generally "NO". Their world has been rocked to the core and nothing will change this. Offering to help, even if it is just to cook a meal is about all we really can do. Offer once and let them be. Your offer has been noted and will be taken up on IF the mom or dad needs your assistance.
-- PRAY FOR THEM! They don't have to know you are doing it. Prayers are always welcome and probably do the most help.
YELLOW LIGHT (Depending on who you are and who the parent is and the relationship you have toward each other)
-- Calling the parents. I said earlier that you should leave them be - and you should. But you can call once - not once a day, not once an hour - ONCE. Don't be offended if they don't answer. You can call to tell them you are available to listen or do something for them. Let the ball be in their court. This action should be reserved for people VERY close to the the couple. If you think you MIGHT be in this inner circle then you probably are not. You need to KNOW that they would want to hear from you before they are ready to reach out to you. Writing an email or letter might even be better. That way they can read it when they are ready without feeling flooded and bombarded.
RED LIGHT (These should go without saying, but people are dumb. They should never be done or said. If I find you ever say or do them I WILL hunt you down like a starving lion and verbally rip you limb from limb)
-- "It's ok. You can have another kid." WHAT?!?! This mom or dad has just had a child die. This isn't a puppy or kitten. IT IS A HUMAN. It is genetically HALF of him or her. There were hopes and dreams that were wrapped up in the excitement of a new life - THIS NEW LIFE! Not some future life. THIS LIFE. It took my husband and I awhile to become pregnant and there were so many hopes and dreams wrapped in this little new life. We didn't know if we would ever be able to have another.
-- Asking when the mom or dad might try again for another child. This is similar to the previous one, but slightly different. You are acknowledging the loss and looking towards the future yes. What you are forgetting is that this parent may (and probably still is) grieving the loss of the child. I talked to a mother who has dealt with the loss of her son, but still openly grieves the loss over 20 years later. There really are things you NEVER get over.
-- "You failed at becoming a parent." I can't make this up. Someone actually told me I failed at becoming a mother because I lost my baby. I didn't fail. God placed a baby in my belly. He also called the baby back to Himself before my dear son took a breath. It wasn't my fault. I did nothing to cause it. I am a mother to my son and always will be. I am not a failure and any mom who loses a baby through no fault of her own isn't either. God has a plan for all His children - we just often don't know what it is.
So in conclusion all I am asking is that you:
1. Think before speaking
2. Take your cues from the grieving parents. If they want space, give them space. If they want to talk, talk to them. You never know what will help someone grieve and what helps may change minute to minute.
3. Pray for healing, understanding and comfort.
GREEN LIGHT (You can say or do these things without risking offending the grieving parents)
-- GIVE THEM SPACE!!!! This seems counter-intuitive. When an adult dies we rally around the grieving family, hug, and tell stories about the person who has passed. But when a parent loses a child so young there are no stories to be told. This unexpected loss leaves everyone asking "WHY?" "WHAT?" "WHERE?" Why did this happen? What exactly happened? Where do we go from here? All these questions have limited to no answered. The parents need time to process this in their own way. This processing can't be done when everyone is calling, texting, trying to get a hold and by extension smother them. The mom and dad of the lost infant need time to spend with each other and grieve before they can face the world and grieve with extended family members. That is not to say they don't love their extended family, but the moment the vow of two becoming one flesh in marriage, the parents of the these new (grieving) parents and siblings become EXTENDED family, not immediate family. A new family is created in marriage, and while this is generally celebrated, when a child is lost, this is the first thing that is forgotten. Even if you are the mom, sister, grandmother, you are not entitled to the inner circle. Get over yourself - they are in more pain than you are. They will reach out when they are ready. Especially if they request time to process what is going on, GIVE THEM SPACE!
-- LISTEN!!! When the mom or dad does reach out to you don't talk. JUST LISTEN. Let him or her guide the conversation. Don't ask an excessive amount of questions. Scratch that, don't ask any questions. Ok, maybe one or two, but none about what happened - at least not in the first year. The wounds are still very fresh and you can't imagine how much pain it causes. Trust me, he or she will open up when he or she is ready. One day it will be like word vomit. The first time details are told it will be a raw explosion of emotions and tears. If the parent wants to talk about the latest baseball game, let him or her. Be grateful that they are talking to you.
-- BE AVAILABLE! But don't be offended if you are not the one that is "chosen" to be the first, second, or even third confidant. After my husband and I dealt with the unexpected loss of our son the people I reached out to weren't the people you would expect. I reached out to a few members of the clergy (ok, so that one should be expected.) Next I reached out to a friend who was also pregnant at the time and who's baby just happened to be due 1 month before my son was supposed to be. This friend just happened to be a social worker. I just needed some sense of "normalcy" while knowing I wasn't going to be interrogated. I also wanted to know about some counseling resources. After a while I reached out to a friend who just happened to be pregnant also, and who's daughter was supposed to be born within a day of my son (they practically shared the same due date). She was (and still is) a dear friend who was pregnant with her third child, never has/had lost a child, but is one of the best prayer warriors I have ever met. I still required some sense of normalcy and hope that things could be better. If you notice - I reached out to men who have no clue what is like to be a parent, but are good listeners - I reached out to two women who know what is like to be a parent, but no clue what it is like to lose a child, but they are good listeners. It wasn't the overbearing people who kept badgering me who I talked to first. I wasn't ready for all their questions so I kept them at arm's length. It was the gentle ones who listened who helped me through the tough times. I did talk with family members about it, but much later. It wasn't until months later that I reached out to fellow mothers who had lost children. All in due time.
-- "Is there anything I can do for you?" The answer is generally "NO". Their world has been rocked to the core and nothing will change this. Offering to help, even if it is just to cook a meal is about all we really can do. Offer once and let them be. Your offer has been noted and will be taken up on IF the mom or dad needs your assistance.
-- PRAY FOR THEM! They don't have to know you are doing it. Prayers are always welcome and probably do the most help.
YELLOW LIGHT (Depending on who you are and who the parent is and the relationship you have toward each other)
-- Calling the parents. I said earlier that you should leave them be - and you should. But you can call once - not once a day, not once an hour - ONCE. Don't be offended if they don't answer. You can call to tell them you are available to listen or do something for them. Let the ball be in their court. This action should be reserved for people VERY close to the the couple. If you think you MIGHT be in this inner circle then you probably are not. You need to KNOW that they would want to hear from you before they are ready to reach out to you. Writing an email or letter might even be better. That way they can read it when they are ready without feeling flooded and bombarded.
RED LIGHT (These should go without saying, but people are dumb. They should never be done or said. If I find you ever say or do them I WILL hunt you down like a starving lion and verbally rip you limb from limb)
-- "It's ok. You can have another kid." WHAT?!?! This mom or dad has just had a child die. This isn't a puppy or kitten. IT IS A HUMAN. It is genetically HALF of him or her. There were hopes and dreams that were wrapped up in the excitement of a new life - THIS NEW LIFE! Not some future life. THIS LIFE. It took my husband and I awhile to become pregnant and there were so many hopes and dreams wrapped in this little new life. We didn't know if we would ever be able to have another.
-- Asking when the mom or dad might try again for another child. This is similar to the previous one, but slightly different. You are acknowledging the loss and looking towards the future yes. What you are forgetting is that this parent may (and probably still is) grieving the loss of the child. I talked to a mother who has dealt with the loss of her son, but still openly grieves the loss over 20 years later. There really are things you NEVER get over.
-- "You failed at becoming a parent." I can't make this up. Someone actually told me I failed at becoming a mother because I lost my baby. I didn't fail. God placed a baby in my belly. He also called the baby back to Himself before my dear son took a breath. It wasn't my fault. I did nothing to cause it. I am a mother to my son and always will be. I am not a failure and any mom who loses a baby through no fault of her own isn't either. God has a plan for all His children - we just often don't know what it is.
So in conclusion all I am asking is that you:
1. Think before speaking
2. Take your cues from the grieving parents. If they want space, give them space. If they want to talk, talk to them. You never know what will help someone grieve and what helps may change minute to minute.
3. Pray for healing, understanding and comfort.
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Learning not to compare
I suffer from a condition where I always feel like I am failing as a mom. This has been made worse by my daughter's former pediatrician making me feel like a horrible mom because my daughter is off the charts tall and way below where she should be in the weight category. She is tall and thin. She doesn't look sickly and is very active - always walking and bouncing around. So am I starving my kid, NO!!! I mean what was God thinking when he gave me such a wonderful little kid? I am forever comparing myself to friends I know with kids a little older than my daughter and in my head I don't measure up. But I have been trying to figure out that not everyone is perfect and I need to stop being so hard on myself but when things like this happen...
So I was feeling especially exhausted a few days ago. I had got home from work at my usual time (3am) and my daughter was WIDE awake. Well since her dad had to work the next morning and I knew she wasn't going to go back to sleep anytime soon, so we went out to the living room (farthest we could get away from daddy so he could sleep) and couch for cuddle time. She was awake until 530! Talk about EXHAUSTED mommy. She woke up a little later than her normal 10am - she waited until 1030. Somehow those times don't add up. 2.5 hours of play time does not equal 30 minutes of sleep in time. So in the morning she had created one very nasty diaper. It was like road construction tar caked on her little tushy and wipes were NOT doing the trick. So at my wits end I decided to sit her on the toilet and use the cloth diaper sprayer to get off the majority before giving her a bath. Well the water coming out of the diaper sprayer is super cold and she DID NOT LIKE IT!! Poor baby!! But she did get a nice warm bath after with loads of play time. The entire time she was screaming because her bottom was super cold I was crying and trying to calm her down. As she was bathing I told her, "I know, I know, C's mom would never do this to her." Later on when she was happy because she got loads of play time in warm water I was reflecting on what happened and said to my little lady, "well yeah, C's mama might do it. I wouldn't put it past her to let her boys play in the mud then hose them down on the back porch before letting them come in the house too." Sometimes you have to do what you have to do to keep your life sane.
At the end of the day I have the happiest kid I know. She is fed, changed and safe. So I am doing ok, right?
So I was feeling especially exhausted a few days ago. I had got home from work at my usual time (3am) and my daughter was WIDE awake. Well since her dad had to work the next morning and I knew she wasn't going to go back to sleep anytime soon, so we went out to the living room (farthest we could get away from daddy so he could sleep) and couch for cuddle time. She was awake until 530! Talk about EXHAUSTED mommy. She woke up a little later than her normal 10am - she waited until 1030. Somehow those times don't add up. 2.5 hours of play time does not equal 30 minutes of sleep in time. So in the morning she had created one very nasty diaper. It was like road construction tar caked on her little tushy and wipes were NOT doing the trick. So at my wits end I decided to sit her on the toilet and use the cloth diaper sprayer to get off the majority before giving her a bath. Well the water coming out of the diaper sprayer is super cold and she DID NOT LIKE IT!! Poor baby!! But she did get a nice warm bath after with loads of play time. The entire time she was screaming because her bottom was super cold I was crying and trying to calm her down. As she was bathing I told her, "I know, I know, C's mom would never do this to her." Later on when she was happy because she got loads of play time in warm water I was reflecting on what happened and said to my little lady, "well yeah, C's mama might do it. I wouldn't put it past her to let her boys play in the mud then hose them down on the back porch before letting them come in the house too." Sometimes you have to do what you have to do to keep your life sane.
At the end of the day I have the happiest kid I know. She is fed, changed and safe. So I am doing ok, right?
Friday, September 14, 2012
Two simple words make all the difference...
Yes, I am going to talk about the two hardest words any person needs to utter.... "I'm sorry." Apparently people have forgotten how to say them!
Today the little lady and I went to the grocery store (not as easy when the one you are with is squirmy and wants to climb out of the cart....but I digress)... As I was getting her out of the car out of the corner of my eye I saw a large teenager who just happened to be Hispanic.... he was running towards me/my car and screaming. Well his intended target was his friend in the car next to us. He wanted to spook her, but instead he nearly made me pee myself. I almost dropped my daughter I was so frightened. Instead I kinda squeezed her a little harder than I intended and turned my back to him. When he started laughing at scaring his friend I turned around and in my very angry mommy voice screamed at him, "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?"
His lame response: "What, I thought you saw me."
Me: "I saw you after you scared the life out of me. What were you thinking? Were you even thinking? Did you not see me getting an infant out of the back of a car? Do you realize I almost dropped her? You need to be aware of your surroundings!"
Him: "Lady, chillax (I HATE THAT WORD! YOU MIGHT AS WELL JUST RUN YOUR NAILS DOWN THE CHALK BOARD NOW!) I was just playing a harmless joke." Then he walked away from me leaving me very very upset.
So what did I do? Well since this young inconsiderate individual works at the store (yes, he did this in his work uniform), I decided to do what any good mom would do.... I tattled. It didn't hurt that the assistant manager was one of the first people I saw when I walked in the store. So I told him what his employee was doing (on property and in uniform no less), how upset it made me, and how unprofessional I found it to be. His response, "I will talk to him."
At no point did either of these gentlemen say they were sorry. The guy who scared the crap out of me and my daughter thought it was funny (but what do you expect from a teenager, right?). The manager (who I thought might understand my point because he was about my parent's age) didn't even seem all that concerned about it. I highly doubt anything is done about this. But I bet, had I actually dropped my daughter and I threatened a law suit there would be loads of people appologizing for the stupidity of one.... or maybe not....
Glad I didn't have to find out.
Today the little lady and I went to the grocery store (not as easy when the one you are with is squirmy and wants to climb out of the cart....but I digress)... As I was getting her out of the car out of the corner of my eye I saw a large teenager who just happened to be Hispanic.... he was running towards me/my car and screaming. Well his intended target was his friend in the car next to us. He wanted to spook her, but instead he nearly made me pee myself. I almost dropped my daughter I was so frightened. Instead I kinda squeezed her a little harder than I intended and turned my back to him. When he started laughing at scaring his friend I turned around and in my very angry mommy voice screamed at him, "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?"
His lame response: "What, I thought you saw me."
Me: "I saw you after you scared the life out of me. What were you thinking? Were you even thinking? Did you not see me getting an infant out of the back of a car? Do you realize I almost dropped her? You need to be aware of your surroundings!"
Him: "Lady, chillax (I HATE THAT WORD! YOU MIGHT AS WELL JUST RUN YOUR NAILS DOWN THE CHALK BOARD NOW!) I was just playing a harmless joke." Then he walked away from me leaving me very very upset.
So what did I do? Well since this young inconsiderate individual works at the store (yes, he did this in his work uniform), I decided to do what any good mom would do.... I tattled. It didn't hurt that the assistant manager was one of the first people I saw when I walked in the store. So I told him what his employee was doing (on property and in uniform no less), how upset it made me, and how unprofessional I found it to be. His response, "I will talk to him."
At no point did either of these gentlemen say they were sorry. The guy who scared the crap out of me and my daughter thought it was funny (but what do you expect from a teenager, right?). The manager (who I thought might understand my point because he was about my parent's age) didn't even seem all that concerned about it. I highly doubt anything is done about this. But I bet, had I actually dropped my daughter and I threatened a law suit there would be loads of people appologizing for the stupidity of one.... or maybe not....
Glad I didn't have to find out.
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Tag - You're It
There are few things that adequately describe my child's behavior - but this is the best I can come up with - Energizer Snow Angel on Pixie Sticks. (If this doesn't make sense, imagine the energizer bunny making snow angel motions mixed with what happens when you give a small child pixie sticks - oh the sugar high) She has 2 speeds - ON and OFF. Lately she has taken this to a new level. She has been getting up a couple times in the middle of the night and usually wants changed, fed, and to PLAY. Her favorite games lately have been bouncing on one of us, playing drums on anything that makes noise, and tickling. I get the job of taking care of her during the night since I am more of a night person and my husband has to get up early for work. But let me tell you.... this gets exhausting since she is awake for 2-3 hours, sleeps for 2-3 hours, and repeat. What happened to my good sleeper? I don't get it!
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Detoxing a baby
It's not what you think - I PROMISE!
So every time we go visit family our child gets very accustomed to being the center of attention. Since everyone loves her so much, she gets loads of attention. This is great. She becomes this social butterfly. Then we have to come home...... and OH NO!!!!! She expects all the attention and there are not enough people at our house to give it to her. She has to detox!! She becomes very sad and melancholy!
Here is a good example. We went to my sister's place for three days. My sister used my child as a human medicine ball (throwing her up in the air), carried her around, showed her off, made funny noises, and generally was a baby's ideal play buddy. You could not have made a baby much happier! Then we had to come home :( She has been trying to bounce like her medicine ball exercises she was doing with my sister. My arms hurt. I tried to put her down.... she whined. It will take 2-3 days for her to stop expecting my sister to come around the corner and play with her.
I would not trade seeing my sister for the detoxification that I have to deal with.
So every time we go visit family our child gets very accustomed to being the center of attention. Since everyone loves her so much, she gets loads of attention. This is great. She becomes this social butterfly. Then we have to come home...... and OH NO!!!!! She expects all the attention and there are not enough people at our house to give it to her. She has to detox!! She becomes very sad and melancholy!
Here is a good example. We went to my sister's place for three days. My sister used my child as a human medicine ball (throwing her up in the air), carried her around, showed her off, made funny noises, and generally was a baby's ideal play buddy. You could not have made a baby much happier! Then we had to come home :( She has been trying to bounce like her medicine ball exercises she was doing with my sister. My arms hurt. I tried to put her down.... she whined. It will take 2-3 days for her to stop expecting my sister to come around the corner and play with her.
I would not trade seeing my sister for the detoxification that I have to deal with.
Friday, May 18, 2012
Make a wife/mom's heart melt
Our daughter has been kind of a stinker when it comes to her sleep pattern lately. My child who early on would be fine with being put down awake at a designated time would quietly play until she fell asleep or just realize once the lights were turned out and the music from the mobile started it was time to close her eyes, grab her bear and just fall asleep. Well she had an ear infection a few weeks back. Because of this, she couldn't stand laying down. She spent the better part of two weeks either sleeping in her swing or on my chest while I sat in the papasan. Not the most comfortable sleeping situation, but hey, both of us got some sleep. Well I think she got very comfortable with the idea of sleeping next to me because she has decided that sleeping on her own will only happen after a temper tantrum. She has been crying (half asleep mind you) prior to settling down for about a week now. Tonight as I was washing the bottles of the day (and listening to her scream), I heard my husband's footsteps going toward our daughter and a few seconds later she stopped crying. I assumed that she had convinced him to pick her up. So after I was done I walked toward them and noticed something unexpected. The baby was in her own bed. My husband was sitting a few feet away softly singing to her and she was just looking at him. She just needed to hear her daddy's voice to calm down. Since I work evenings and am often times not home when she goes to sleep I asked him if he does this often. I was pleasantly happy when he said he does and it generally works. It is so nice to see how much she adores her daddy and how much he loves her.
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
A "Great" Way to Start the Day!
There are some days when you know, "it can only get better from here, right?" I am having one of THOSE days - and it is only 10 am!
So I woke up a little after 8am to my daughter whimpering. She was wet and hungry. Ok, this is a daily thing, no biggie! So I give her the binky, go toss the dirty diapers in the washing machine, and start it, and go pump. (She refuses to latch properly and we have found that she is perfectly content with refusing to learn so that she can get her milk in the bottle - soooo much easier to eat from a bottle than from mom! Grrr) Thus far, it is no different than any other day. So I get her bottle all ready to go and change her. (She also will not eat if her pants are dirty!) As I am changing her my phone rings (of course, because it has to ring when I am busy!) and the number comes up 000-0000 on the caller ID (blocked number), so I don't think much of it, let it go to voice mail and continue on. I put the diaper in it's pail, wash my hands, grab my daughter, the bottle, and my phone and sit on the edge of the bed to feed her. She was pretty hungry and sucking the bottle down pretty quickly, so I thought, well lets see who called me and left a voice message. So I call my voice mailbox, type in my code and hear, "Hello, this is Officer ______ from the sheriff's department." At this moment the thought crosses my mind, I am the ICE (in case of emergency) contact for 2 people for sure - my mom and my husband. I know this because I am the one that set up both phones. I let the bottle slip just a little and it hits the back of my poor daughter's very sensitive throat. "One of our officers has found your (insert make and model of the car my husband drives) abandoned. Please call us back if you get this message in the next 10-15 minutes." It had been about that amount of time already. As she is finishing up her message, my daughter has finished vomiting all over both of us. I am not talking just a little spit up. No, I am talking covered both her and I from neck down, coming out of her mouth and nose vomit. There was not a dry article of clothing between the two of us. My shirt, bra, pj pants, and even underwear were soaked. You could have ringed out her little sleeper it was that wet. GREAT!! So at this moment I know a few things:
1. The baby is getting a bath.
2. My husband is not a small man and he knows how to fight. His work has even used him as a fill in "bouncer" on occasion. No one in their right mind would intentionally pick a fight with him for no reason.
3. My husband is out fishing. He had talked about trying out a new location last week. He probably unknowingly parked where he shouldn't have.
4. My husband does not drive a car that most thieves would consider worthy of their time and energy to steal - especially during daylight hours.
5. My husband has a bad habit of being bad at cell phone usage. He will let the battery go dead. He will leave it in odd places. He will forget to change the ringer from silent to sound.
All these factors and my heart still skipped a beat and then rapidly sped up. So I listened to the message again to get the number and called the dispatcher back. She puts me on hold and comes back on the line and says, "Oh, one of our officers has made contact with your husband. He was out fishing. Have a nice day." CLICK. Thank you for telling me something I already knew. So I strip the baby down to her birthday suit and run the bath water. I know there is not going to be a lot of hot water because the washing machine is almost completely finished, but the little floating turtle says that the temperature is acceptable for baby bathing and she reeks of vomit. So she gets cleaned up and a little play time in the water (her favorite thing to do). I get her diapered and dressed and she was falling asleep, so I laid her back in bed. So I jump in the shower - only to discover I get to take a tepid-cold shower. Yeah! Go ME!
So, how was your morning?
So I woke up a little after 8am to my daughter whimpering. She was wet and hungry. Ok, this is a daily thing, no biggie! So I give her the binky, go toss the dirty diapers in the washing machine, and start it, and go pump. (She refuses to latch properly and we have found that she is perfectly content with refusing to learn so that she can get her milk in the bottle - soooo much easier to eat from a bottle than from mom! Grrr) Thus far, it is no different than any other day. So I get her bottle all ready to go and change her. (She also will not eat if her pants are dirty!) As I am changing her my phone rings (of course, because it has to ring when I am busy!) and the number comes up 000-0000 on the caller ID (blocked number), so I don't think much of it, let it go to voice mail and continue on. I put the diaper in it's pail, wash my hands, grab my daughter, the bottle, and my phone and sit on the edge of the bed to feed her. She was pretty hungry and sucking the bottle down pretty quickly, so I thought, well lets see who called me and left a voice message. So I call my voice mailbox, type in my code and hear, "Hello, this is Officer ______ from the sheriff's department." At this moment the thought crosses my mind, I am the ICE (in case of emergency) contact for 2 people for sure - my mom and my husband. I know this because I am the one that set up both phones. I let the bottle slip just a little and it hits the back of my poor daughter's very sensitive throat. "One of our officers has found your (insert make and model of the car my husband drives) abandoned. Please call us back if you get this message in the next 10-15 minutes." It had been about that amount of time already. As she is finishing up her message, my daughter has finished vomiting all over both of us. I am not talking just a little spit up. No, I am talking covered both her and I from neck down, coming out of her mouth and nose vomit. There was not a dry article of clothing between the two of us. My shirt, bra, pj pants, and even underwear were soaked. You could have ringed out her little sleeper it was that wet. GREAT!! So at this moment I know a few things:
1. The baby is getting a bath.
2. My husband is not a small man and he knows how to fight. His work has even used him as a fill in "bouncer" on occasion. No one in their right mind would intentionally pick a fight with him for no reason.
3. My husband is out fishing. He had talked about trying out a new location last week. He probably unknowingly parked where he shouldn't have.
4. My husband does not drive a car that most thieves would consider worthy of their time and energy to steal - especially during daylight hours.
5. My husband has a bad habit of being bad at cell phone usage. He will let the battery go dead. He will leave it in odd places. He will forget to change the ringer from silent to sound.
All these factors and my heart still skipped a beat and then rapidly sped up. So I listened to the message again to get the number and called the dispatcher back. She puts me on hold and comes back on the line and says, "Oh, one of our officers has made contact with your husband. He was out fishing. Have a nice day." CLICK. Thank you for telling me something I already knew. So I strip the baby down to her birthday suit and run the bath water. I know there is not going to be a lot of hot water because the washing machine is almost completely finished, but the little floating turtle says that the temperature is acceptable for baby bathing and she reeks of vomit. So she gets cleaned up and a little play time in the water (her favorite thing to do). I get her diapered and dressed and she was falling asleep, so I laid her back in bed. So I jump in the shower - only to discover I get to take a tepid-cold shower. Yeah! Go ME!
So, how was your morning?
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